It's called "Kerrying," and it's named for the U.S. Secretary of State, and Vietnam War veteran, John Kerry. The controversial act involves service members throwing away their hard earned military medals in public protest. Interestingly enough, however, is that Kerrying is not meant to protest any political situation, but rather the requirement to wear medals on the Dress Blues uniform to the Marine Corps Ball.
The Commandant recently issued a statement denouncing the behavior; "The Sergeant Major and I are committed to ending this heinous transgression. If we allow Marines to cast off tradition this easily, what else are they going to forego?"
Not all Marines are pleased with the General's resolution, however. "It's such bullshit that I have to wear my National Defense Medal to that ball! It's so much easier to go 'slick,'" Private First Class Alverez explained. "I've crunched the numbers, and the time it takes me to continuously mount that damn medal could be better spent preparing to get to the fight."
The rise in popularity of Kerrying can be traced to a pair of factors. Namely, Marines face increasing requirements to remain as expeditionary as possible. Additionally, Marines are often too lazy to take the five minutes required to put their medals on their uniform. The latter becomes increasingly important with the Marine Corps Ball coming next month.
More alarming is that the movement is not exclusive to junior troops. "The ball is incredibly lame. I hate having to put those stupid medals on. Who cares." A Marine Major explained, on condition of anonymity.
Currently a number of senior Marines are making it their mission to put a stop to what they perceive as a dangerous new fad. 1stSgt Thompson, a former Drill Instructor, explained, "My brain housing group can't even begin to process where this is coming from. If you rate awards, you will wear them. At the end of the day, we're Marines. It's who we are. It's what we do."
During a debate on to Kerry or not to Kerry, a Marine Captain was also overheard explaining how "If they sell the star with brackets on the back, I am not going to remove the brackets with a damn pair of pliers, sand down the back of the star, and then go and buy glue to glue it on just to make it flush. They should sell the damn things that way if thats how they want them worn."
ReplyDeleteThe Captain held firm to this opinion and continued to shout this down the halls as he was dragged away by a mob of crusty Majors and Lieutenant Colonels for some "hip pocket PME" behind the ISU90s.